There is suffering in our community. That was evident during prayer time on Sunday. Suffering won’t go away this side of heaven, but it shouldn’t be gone through alone. There is nothing that binds people like shared suffering. While in California this summer, I ran into a former co-worker and caught up on our lives. It’s probably been four years since I had time to talk to him. And we picked up right where our friendship had left off. In my experience, though, that is the way it works with some friends. I’ve had that happen on a few occasions with other men as well. However, the crucial factor was not our manliness, but our experiences of shared suffering that drew us together. Although, as I think back, those experiences were pretty manly.
Shared suffering creates relational bonds that are not easily broken. Solomon noted that two can stand against one – the context being the shared suffering of physical attack – while a threefold cord is not quickly broken (Ecclesiastes 4:12). The Apostle Paul gave focus to suffering in Romans 8:18, “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.” (ESV) The glory to be revealed is the other side of the suffering, which must be experienced to fully reveal the glory. But again, suffering shouldn’t, and doesn’t have to be experienced alone.
It is not easy to ask for help, I know. But when it is needed, the people in your life should know that you are there for them. Be there to sit and cry with them, walk alongside them, maybe even pray for them. And check around to make sure you have someone who will do the same for you. Jesus entered into the world’s suffering and is still here reaching out to be the third strand of that cord, for those willing to take hold. Look around this week and see where you might be part of a threefold cord to help someone make it to the other side of suffering. It builds relationships, and we can all use more of those.